Cancer, a word i never thought would enter my life, but it did.
The word cancer holds so much pain and hatred for me, but through all the pain cancer has caused it also holds a deeper meaning. A meaning that goes beyond anything i ever imagined it to.
From a young age i heard this word float around in conversations my parents would have, i never knew what it meant but i knew it was bad. I grew up but somehow this word was able to mould itself into my life, our lives… And when it finally let go, it came back.
Finding out my mom had cancer for a second time was one of the most devastating and heart wrenching days of my life. Cancer, had struck once again and this time it was there to stay and there was nothing anyone could do about it. Even though i knew deep down on the months leading up to my moms second diagnosis that it wasn’t good, i held out hope that everything was fine.
The months after my moms diagnosis were unfamiliar to me, the world still moved forward and so did we. I knew my mom had cancer but i chose to push the end outcome out of my mind, i never truly believed the outcome would be what it was. Nothing could ever prepare me for the day she would no longer be here, but that day came and the harsh truth is you still have to live and breath every waking moment of it, the world doesn’t stop.
Through all the pain and hurt that cancer has brought, it’s taught me things i never knew were possible.
Watching my mother courageously live for the rest of us and putting on a brave face everyday to shield our pain despite the physical and emotional pain she was going through, taught me that there is no end to how strong and courageous a person can be.
I learnt how precious and unpredictable life can be, You truly never know whats going to happen. I learnt how to live without fear, to love and do the things i want to do. Facing life fearlessly like there is nothing you can’t do.
I learnt that i am not alone…
Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.