You were never the enemy, I was.

I have neglected you for so long. Not in just one way, but in many. You keep me here and for that I should be grateful, but why are you so hard to love? From the age of 10, I abandoned you.  The words they told us weren't true. I'm sorry for believing them. I took my pain out on you, you didn't deserve those scars. No one does. I've hated everything about you, and you never turned your back on me. Every pill I swallowed, you fought … Continue reading You were never the enemy, I was.

Late night thoughts.

It's four in the morning as I write this because I can't chase away my thoughts tonight. I've tried so hard to ignore them, as I do most days, but pushing them away is only making them more difficult to run from. I feel lonely, I could be surrounded by nothing but people and still feel lonely. My heart breaks each time I think about myself. Each time I do, I feel an overwhelming sense of failure. I've failed myself. I had this passion, and I wanted to impact people's lives, but I feel like the most forgetful person in the world. I've never belonged, Even when I had friends I always felt like everyone had this hatred against me. I don't have many friends, in fact, I have none. I've always struggled to let people in, but for so long I felt like I didn't belong … Continue reading Late night thoughts.

Racism.

I've never made a post about this before and honestly, I'm pretty scared too, I don't know why I feel anxious about It. But I'm determined to open up about parts of my life that feel almost impossible to talk about just to raise awareness. I'm in a relationship with someone who isn't "my colour." … Continue reading Racism.